17 Comments

I hear you. I lost my mum in January, just 18 months after losing my wife of 48 years. Be kind to yourself and take as long as you need.

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Thank you Martin. What a rollercoaster of emotion you've been on, too. I thought I could just 'keep going' but after four days back down there I was utterly broken.

Sending my very best to you.

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There’s a quote (there are so many) that I thought summed it up pretty well. “One person leaves and the whole world seems empty.” This really is when friends and family come into their own. Take care.

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Thanks Martin. Sending love to you

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Sep 18Liked by Sue Reed

Your words caught me in the chest as I remembered my own mother's passing last year and the preceding years. In my mother's case, COVID had a lot to answer for, and she ended up in a nursing home as a direct result of the various lockdowns and ensuing isolation when none of us could visit her during her nine spells in the hospital, which eventually rendered her incapable of staying in her own home. She, too, would suffer nasty hallucinations where insects were crawling up the walls and across her bed, or she was being abducted and driven around Dublin city in search of home. The worst part was she developed a very horrible septic infection from scratching herself, which would not heal. It burrowed right down to her prosthetic knee replacement. That meant she was often in agony from the pain.

On one occasion, shortly before her death, when I was visiting her, I could hear her screaming down the corridor with the pain of it after the wound was dressed earlier in the day. As an observer, it was just as horrendous to witness as it was for her to deal with it. I was fortunate to be able to get over to Dublin in time before she passed away. I sat with her in her last few hours, holding her hand. She did not go peacefully. She fought it every step of the way.

Selfishly, for me, it was a relief. I couldn't bear how her mind went; she was in so much pain, and her quality of life was so poor despite the best efforts of the nursing home staff - I couldn't fault them. Carrying on finding the good things is such a good idea. I will have to remember that. And now you must deal with your Dad when you've barely had time to draw breath. My Dad died 21 years before my mother. He went quickly, which was a shock at the time, but in retrospect, he came off better than she did.

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I'm so sorry to hear of your mum's brutal last days. Holding your hand across the waters, Carol. Thanks for sharing 🙏

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Brave words Sue with all that is going on for you. Carry on finding the little good things, they are everywhere and can get you through many a difficult situation. Best wishes.

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Thank you Carl, and with you in mind I shall be taking my watercolour paints out into the garden this afternoon to see if I can mix the perfect coral pink for that lily.

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Would love to see it when you do 👍

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Thanks Carl. I'll be posting soon about giving myself the permission to paint, will make sure to tag you in it.

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Thinking of you Sue x

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Thank you Sarah 💚

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I’m so sorry to hear about your dad, Sue, I hope he’s doing ok and you’re taking care of yourself too. You’ve reminded me to look for those little good things too x

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Thanks Lesley. It's all pretty rubbish but writing is most definitely spurring me on...

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I’m so sorry to hear about what has been happening in your life recently. I’m holding you in my thoughts and hoping many more glimmers make their way into your world. X

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Thank you so much Amanda. 💚

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I am so sorry for your loss. Truly. Losing Mom is difficult. 😭 Sending love and prayers. 🙏

I absolutely love the little good things. Thank you for sharing that with us. May your life be filled with little good things.

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